Great piece, it was hard hitting, I feel I've come to the end of a journey and am desperately searching for the new thing. Spending all my free time searching, I've ended up in somewhere I haven't been before, burned out not by work but by my free time.
If the search for something new isn't working, consider taking a step back. What if you spent your free time following joy and curiosity for a while -- without an agenda (is time really 'free' if you're using it to search actively for a big idea?).
The search for the 'new thing' itself can be treacherous because few ideas feel big in the beginning. It's like going on a first date and wondering if this is 'the one'. Very difficult, I know from experience :)
Perhaps a portfolio of meaningful things works better until have more clarity.
Lastly, you could document your search and self-impose a structure. Say, a weekly or monthly reflection on a few things you've learned. A regular check-in conversation with people on the same journey. Something to break the big chunk of time down and have some constraints or deadlines. Good luck!
Those are all excellent recommendations, I truly appreciate them. The portfolio of meaning is an idea that is worth exploring and giving some solid attention to.
I completely agree; it's not free time if there's an agenda. It's become a bit of an obsession, well maybe more than a bit, It's boiling over and turning itself into a mid-life crisis.
After commenting I realized I have been here before but that was 20+ years ago, which feels like another lifetime, a lifetime of more palpable desperation and necessity. Any lessons learn seem to have mostly been misplaced or forgotten.
I have started documenting recently, still just a scratchpad but it's helped me realize without the past desperation and necessity driving me to act I've gotten caught up in a paralysis of weighing perceived opportunity costs of imaginary outcomes. It's a perpetual fence to sit on.
Taking the time to sharing your thoughts and suggestions made what has been a long stressful day much better :)
It might be worth thought-dumping everything (I'd recommend writing by hand) - what's going on now, what is same/different vs. 20 years ago. Where is the fear. Apply an investigative technique like Katie Byron's the work. What keeps haunting you/where do you get in your own way. Write it all down then put it aside and find motion, conversation, and stillness to process. Walks, travel, meditation, trusted friends who listen. Use the MIQ technique in my night shift post (or other techniques) to let your unconscious speak. Give yourself a moment to reflect but then start to get into motion. Sometimes any action/motion is valuable because you uncover new information as you follow you trailheads.
Awesome! Your article, and writing out my thoughts and feelings in the comments have already helped to deepen my understanding of what's going on. I'm excited to looking deeper into these suggestions and work through some of these processes. thanks again for taking the time, it's greatly appreciated.
Great piece on the process… I feel like I’ve been on a dry spell and understand that pressure. It chips away at the original desire I had to share thoughts
Hi JR. Thanks for sharing. For me, it's primarily an issue of direction and the business end. I have more ideas than I can handle (the curse and blessing of ADD).
But I understand the dry spell. My recommendation is to investigate the root cause. The well may be dry because you don't have input that you're curious and excited about. Or there may be too much other work and the mind is simply exhausted to do much creative work on top. Or: investigate the 'original desire'. What did you want to share and why. How much of it is truly you and how much was memetic? If you dropped everything you've done so far, what *would* be fun?
Thanks, Uma. It's so difficult, isn't it? We've been trained to make good use of every moment when sometimes that good use would be to just... sit on the porch, sip iced tea, watch the clouds?
The revenue chart is the cause of so much hope and despair. Every uptick brings you closer to a feeling that you are making it. Every down tick solidifies the thought that people no longer care what you write. I'm curious as to whether other writers have seen a similar slowdown / decline since the start of the year? It feels a bit similar to my own experience.
Hi Peter. Yes, it's a little like owning stocks and watching the charts. We know we shouldn't do it :)
I know writers who are doing well and others who are struggling. My sense is that one should be okay with an uphill battle - sisyphys - against video and AI generated content.
And one has to be okay with the natural flow of people coming and going, caring and no longer caring.
“Years ago, I would have spent a lot of time in that space.
I didn’t have practices to carry me through. I used to give in to my tendency to isolate. And I didn’t grasp that this was not the world being unfair to me but a misery of my own creation.
The answer to contraction is expansion — reaching out, hanging out, working out, walking out, praying, chanting, even crying out loud.”
I have (tentatively) reached a similar awakening. I realize it wasn’t merely ignorance (& naivety to the fact that such a thing as emotional weather existed and required tending) but also fear. For me, there was so much fear— and that was tied up with going inside. The fears were (all?!) incredibly outdated/irrational, yet these internalized blockages constrained so much of life. Led to so much needless suffering.
Thanks for sharing this, and am so glad you wished to share this with others on a similar trail.
Great piece, it was hard hitting, I feel I've come to the end of a journey and am desperately searching for the new thing. Spending all my free time searching, I've ended up in somewhere I haven't been before, burned out not by work but by my free time.
Thank you for sharing, Kris.
If the search for something new isn't working, consider taking a step back. What if you spent your free time following joy and curiosity for a while -- without an agenda (is time really 'free' if you're using it to search actively for a big idea?).
The search for the 'new thing' itself can be treacherous because few ideas feel big in the beginning. It's like going on a first date and wondering if this is 'the one'. Very difficult, I know from experience :)
Perhaps a portfolio of meaningful things works better until have more clarity.
https://philosophyinhell.substack.com/p/instead-of-your-lifes-purpose
Lastly, you could document your search and self-impose a structure. Say, a weekly or monthly reflection on a few things you've learned. A regular check-in conversation with people on the same journey. Something to break the big chunk of time down and have some constraints or deadlines. Good luck!
Those are all excellent recommendations, I truly appreciate them. The portfolio of meaning is an idea that is worth exploring and giving some solid attention to.
I completely agree; it's not free time if there's an agenda. It's become a bit of an obsession, well maybe more than a bit, It's boiling over and turning itself into a mid-life crisis.
After commenting I realized I have been here before but that was 20+ years ago, which feels like another lifetime, a lifetime of more palpable desperation and necessity. Any lessons learn seem to have mostly been misplaced or forgotten.
I have started documenting recently, still just a scratchpad but it's helped me realize without the past desperation and necessity driving me to act I've gotten caught up in a paralysis of weighing perceived opportunity costs of imaginary outcomes. It's a perpetual fence to sit on.
Taking the time to sharing your thoughts and suggestions made what has been a long stressful day much better :)
It might be worth thought-dumping everything (I'd recommend writing by hand) - what's going on now, what is same/different vs. 20 years ago. Where is the fear. Apply an investigative technique like Katie Byron's the work. What keeps haunting you/where do you get in your own way. Write it all down then put it aside and find motion, conversation, and stillness to process. Walks, travel, meditation, trusted friends who listen. Use the MIQ technique in my night shift post (or other techniques) to let your unconscious speak. Give yourself a moment to reflect but then start to get into motion. Sometimes any action/motion is valuable because you uncover new information as you follow you trailheads.
Awesome! Your article, and writing out my thoughts and feelings in the comments have already helped to deepen my understanding of what's going on. I'm excited to looking deeper into these suggestions and work through some of these processes. thanks again for taking the time, it's greatly appreciated.
Great piece on the process… I feel like I’ve been on a dry spell and understand that pressure. It chips away at the original desire I had to share thoughts
Hi JR. Thanks for sharing. For me, it's primarily an issue of direction and the business end. I have more ideas than I can handle (the curse and blessing of ADD).
But I understand the dry spell. My recommendation is to investigate the root cause. The well may be dry because you don't have input that you're curious and excited about. Or there may be too much other work and the mind is simply exhausted to do much creative work on top. Or: investigate the 'original desire'. What did you want to share and why. How much of it is truly you and how much was memetic? If you dropped everything you've done so far, what *would* be fun?
I’m currently on a break from work and this resonated. Particularly ‘Even my not-doing is usually a kind of doing.’ Too real.
Thanks, Uma. It's so difficult, isn't it? We've been trained to make good use of every moment when sometimes that good use would be to just... sit on the porch, sip iced tea, watch the clouds?
Ditto
oh my god I've truly never felt so seen in my life
Hi Katie, glad it resonated and yet I also hope you're in a good place and finding a way to move forward :)
The revenue chart is the cause of so much hope and despair. Every uptick brings you closer to a feeling that you are making it. Every down tick solidifies the thought that people no longer care what you write. I'm curious as to whether other writers have seen a similar slowdown / decline since the start of the year? It feels a bit similar to my own experience.
Hi Peter. Yes, it's a little like owning stocks and watching the charts. We know we shouldn't do it :)
I know writers who are doing well and others who are struggling. My sense is that one should be okay with an uphill battle - sisyphys - against video and AI generated content.
And one has to be okay with the natural flow of people coming and going, caring and no longer caring.
“Years ago, I would have spent a lot of time in that space.
I didn’t have practices to carry me through. I used to give in to my tendency to isolate. And I didn’t grasp that this was not the world being unfair to me but a misery of my own creation.
The answer to contraction is expansion — reaching out, hanging out, working out, walking out, praying, chanting, even crying out loud.”
I have (tentatively) reached a similar awakening. I realize it wasn’t merely ignorance (& naivety to the fact that such a thing as emotional weather existed and required tending) but also fear. For me, there was so much fear— and that was tied up with going inside. The fears were (all?!) incredibly outdated/irrational, yet these internalized blockages constrained so much of life. Led to so much needless suffering.
Thanks for sharing this, and am so glad you wished to share this with others on a similar trail.
💚 🥃